Sophie and my nephew(M) were in the toy room today... Here are some conversations:
Sophie: Knock Knock
M: Who's there?
Sophie: Orange.
M: Orange who?
Sophie: Orange you glad youre not evil like me?
M: Yeah, yeah I am....
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Sophie: Why did the bear go over the mountain?
M: I dunno, why?
Sophie: Cause he couldnt go under it.....Well, *that* makes no sense?
M: No, no it doesnt.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Sophie: Hey, I went to church this morning!
M: So?
Sophie: Do you know what they gave me to eat?
M: No....
Sophie: NOTHING! Can you believe that?
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Sophie's Career Aspirations...
This happened years ago...
Sophie was probably 2 1/2 or 3 yrs old....I was trying to get her dressed, she was running around naked or nearly naked. Her daddy said "Girl, you better get your clothes on. Do you want people to see you naked?"
Sophie, in perfect 2 1/2-3 yr old sass, stopped in her tracks, put her hand on her hip and said "Daddy, When I grow up, Im gonna dance naked, in front of people, for money! And you and Momma can come watch!"
Her daddy picked his jaw up off the floor to ask "And where are you gonna put this money? In your pockets?"
So she slapped her OTHER hand onto her OTHER hip and replied as only a child with no clue can....
"I will be NAKED and I will have NO POCKETS! I will put it in my CRASH REGISTER!"
Sophie was probably 2 1/2 or 3 yrs old....I was trying to get her dressed, she was running around naked or nearly naked. Her daddy said "Girl, you better get your clothes on. Do you want people to see you naked?"
Sophie, in perfect 2 1/2-3 yr old sass, stopped in her tracks, put her hand on her hip and said "Daddy, When I grow up, Im gonna dance naked, in front of people, for money! And you and Momma can come watch!"
Her daddy picked his jaw up off the floor to ask "And where are you gonna put this money? In your pockets?"
So she slapped her OTHER hand onto her OTHER hip and replied as only a child with no clue can....
"I will be NAKED and I will have NO POCKETS! I will put it in my CRASH REGISTER!"
Monday, May 23, 2011
New kittens....
We have new kittens....5. Joy joy.
Sophie is IN LOVE. 7 yr old girl, new kittens, yep, love love love. The other cats(Steve Fletcher, Peaches and Smokey, not) so much.
Sophie was jumping on her trampoline while I cooked supper. She came inside and told me "Steve was heading to the porch, but when he saw the babies, he turned around. I asked him where he was going and he told me that he was afraid he would have to babysit..."
Sophie is IN LOVE. 7 yr old girl, new kittens, yep, love love love. The other cats(Steve Fletcher, Peaches and Smokey, not) so much.
Sophie was jumping on her trampoline while I cooked supper. She came inside and told me "Steve was heading to the porch, but when he saw the babies, he turned around. I asked him where he was going and he told me that he was afraid he would have to babysit..."
Sophie at my sister's house
When Sophie got off the school bus, she stayed with my sister so I could go do errands after work. I picked her up and she had wisdom to impart.
"Mom, mom, mom, mom, mom..."
"What? Im trying to drive."
"If you are at (my sister's), and M(her husband) has to go poop, you need to LEAVE. He MAKES THE WHOLE HOUSE STINK!"
I'm speechless....
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Later, my sister called. She told me that while Sophie was there, it rained(whoo hoo, big surprise). All of a sudden, BOOM! This big clap of thunder BOOMED, everyone jumped. Sophie looked around and said "BOY! Thatll make a chiken lay an egg!"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
She also told me she was sending me a picture....
Sophie was playing with some baseballs.....
"Mom, mom, mom, mom, mom..."
"What? Im trying to drive."
"If you are at (my sister's), and M(her husband) has to go poop, you need to LEAVE. He MAKES THE WHOLE HOUSE STINK!"
I'm speechless....
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Later, my sister called. She told me that while Sophie was there, it rained(whoo hoo, big surprise). All of a sudden, BOOM! This big clap of thunder BOOMED, everyone jumped. Sophie looked around and said "BOY! Thatll make a chiken lay an egg!"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
She also told me she was sending me a picture....
Sophie was playing with some baseballs.....
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Allergies...
This happened April 27, 2011....
Sophie has allergies. They are not life threatening, they just manifest into severe hay fever symptoms.
I spent night before last at my sister's house because the road on either side of my house is impassable due to flooding. We knew it was rising Wednesday night and I just stayed down there so I could get to work yesterday. Sophie stayed at Mom's and they came out through the neighbor's pig path after daylight so she could catch the bus. This meant nobody was at my house for over 24 hours to feed the cats. (they are outdoor cats)
We go home last night and as I am putting the key in the doorknob Sophie says "What's that?" kinda strangled like. I looked over, "Eh, a cat has killed a mole..." it's on it's back with it's little paws in the air, dead as a doornail.
She SHRIEKS and climbs up my back(I still don't know how she managed it, I was on the top step, she was on the bottom) screaming "IM ALLERGIC! IM ALLERGIC!" the whole time. I finally get us in the door and try to calm her down....
"WHAT are you talking about? You aren't allergic to moles..."
She looked at me through her tears and says "Uh huh.... The allergy doctor says I'm allergic to dogs, cats, grass, pollen and MOLES!"
Ummm....yeah, she's allergic to MOLD.
Sophie has allergies. They are not life threatening, they just manifest into severe hay fever symptoms.
I spent night before last at my sister's house because the road on either side of my house is impassable due to flooding. We knew it was rising Wednesday night and I just stayed down there so I could get to work yesterday. Sophie stayed at Mom's and they came out through the neighbor's pig path after daylight so she could catch the bus. This meant nobody was at my house for over 24 hours to feed the cats. (they are outdoor cats)
We go home last night and as I am putting the key in the doorknob Sophie says "What's that?" kinda strangled like. I looked over, "Eh, a cat has killed a mole..." it's on it's back with it's little paws in the air, dead as a doornail.
She SHRIEKS and climbs up my back(I still don't know how she managed it, I was on the top step, she was on the bottom) screaming "IM ALLERGIC! IM ALLERGIC!" the whole time. I finally get us in the door and try to calm her down....
"WHAT are you talking about? You aren't allergic to moles..."
She looked at me through her tears and says "Uh huh.... The allergy doctor says I'm allergic to dogs, cats, grass, pollen and MOLES!"
Ummm....yeah, she's allergic to MOLD.
I'm going to add things as they happen, but for now, Im going to tell recent things and maybe even some not-so-recent gems she has came up with.
Today...Went outside this morning to find FOUR barely weaned kittens on my porch. Sophie is BESIDE HERSELF with joy. She doesnt care she is so allergic she has to take shots. She doesnt care we already own 3 outside cats. They are perfect and adorable and HERS. She played outside with them for awhile and then brought one inside.....
Sophie holds up the kitten so I can see its stomach and says "Is this a boy or a girl?"
Me: "How would I know? Its too little to tell."(Im a crap cat sexer til theres testicles showing)
Sophie: "Well, if they were COWS we could tell. Girl cows have udders and pee out of their butts. Boy cows...."
Me: "Wait, what? Boy cows? Do you mean bulls?"
Sophie: "Yeah, bulls. Girl cows pee out of their butts and have udders. BULLS pee from that thing under their stomach. They dont have udders, either."
Today...Went outside this morning to find FOUR barely weaned kittens on my porch. Sophie is BESIDE HERSELF with joy. She doesnt care she is so allergic she has to take shots. She doesnt care we already own 3 outside cats. They are perfect and adorable and HERS. She played outside with them for awhile and then brought one inside.....
Sophie holds up the kitten so I can see its stomach and says "Is this a boy or a girl?"
Me: "How would I know? Its too little to tell."(Im a crap cat sexer til theres testicles showing)
Sophie: "Well, if they were COWS we could tell. Girl cows have udders and pee out of their butts. Boy cows...."
Me: "Wait, what? Boy cows? Do you mean bulls?"
Sophie: "Yeah, bulls. Girl cows pee out of their butts and have udders. BULLS pee from that thing under their stomach. They dont have udders, either."
Intro to Us
Im Christy.......born in December, 1968. I'm mom to 3 children...Anthony(11/88), Nick(12/93) and Sophie(1/04). I'm also Mamaw to Keegan(12/10). Everything is wild around here, but Sophie is an entity unto herself. She says so many funny things, I wanted a place to perserve them instead of trying to keep them in my head and my forget them.
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